


Why Do Write Like You Need It To Survive?

by SGSKHKT



Series: Pride Is The Word I'm Looking For [2]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Gen, Loneliness, Self-Reflection, What else is this, i dont know what to tag this or what i have done, i guess, i promise this is better written than it seems, i wrote this at like 12am, i'm just yoinking tags now, i'm really selling myself short here, is this angst?, my friends have said this is angst, that's funky
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-12
Updated: 2020-10-12
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:13:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 731
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26695798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SGSKHKT/pseuds/SGSKHKT
Summary: Day 4.I have finished the flag,Fundy reminisces about L'manberg and debates his allegiance to it as he writes in his journal.
Relationships: No Romantic Relationship(s)
Series: Pride Is The Word I'm Looking For [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1968136
Comments: 7
Kudos: 78





	Why Do Write Like You Need It To Survive?

**Author's Note:**

> edit october 12: added small details bc this is now part of a series pog

Fundy sighed as he slid down the dirt wall of his secret room. He was glad his base was deep into DreamSMP territory, away from the watchful eyes of Manburg, else his base would be raided by Schlatt like Jack Manifold’s. And his base could not be raided by Schlatt at all costs.

He flipped open his book, pausing as he saw the tattered pictures hastily stuck onto the front page.

The first was an image of him and Wilbur. Wilbur was ruffling his hair, grinning as Fundy glared at his father with a half amused, half annoyed expression. He missed those times.

The second was he and Niki in their suits campaigning for Coconut2020. They were both laughing as they worked in Niki’s bakery, cookie crumbs and flour dirtying their suits. It seemed like such a distant past now but it had been no more than a week ago.

The third was him and Tubbo in Niki’s base. Their eyes were filled with wonder and excitement as an orange blur spun around in a circle. Fungi. He missed Fungi.

The fourth was an image of himself and Eret before the war. Before Eret had even gotten diamond gear. They were sitting in a boat, Eret in iron armour and Fundy in his black jacket. They were laughing like they didn’t have a care in the world. He supposed, at that time, they didn’t.

Images of what he had lost.

His hands trembled as he flipped past the images to a blank page, ignoring the sting in his eyes.

_ Day 4. _

_ I have finished the flag,  _

He hated the flag he made. The glow of it was menacing yet eerily beautiful, but it didn’t flow in the wind like the L’manberg flag. Instead, it stood stock still as the winds raged, a harsh reminder of the obsidian it was made out of. A harsh reminder of Order.

_ rebuilt the country and taken down that which was agains’t us. _

He remembers how his hands shook as he took down the Elton John house, despite knowing it was the one thing Eret was fine with being removed. He remembers his blood running cold as Schlatt boasted of his plans to make Tubbo take down what was left of the Camar Van. He remembers the lump in his throat as he took down his own rocket.

_ Progress is looking good on Schlatt’s side. I have once again been promoted, to a new position. Bishop. Not too many spots away from being the Queen herself.  _

He smiled slightly at the line. He remembers playing chess with Tubbo before the war at their jungle base, playing with him until the younger boy finally got a win.

_ However, _

He paused.

His hands shook.

_ I am not sure where I stand in this war. Am I on the right side. _

He was. He was sure he was.

Was he?

The people he sided with didn’t even know he was on their side.

The people he sided with didn’t even trust him.

The people he sided with hated him.

_ There is no true answer to that question, and it can only be told, by time.  _

He closed his eyes as he leaned his head back onto the dirt wall behind him.

Schlatt had almost caught him with the book. 

If Schlatt threw him out where would he stand?

A traitor to his family and a traitor to his land.

A traitor with nowhere to call home.

He shrunk into himself, the pang in his chest growing.

Was this how Eret felt after the betrayal? Was this how someone was meant to feel after a betrayal?

He thinks of Wilbur’s heartbroken silence and Niki’s barely concealed rage.

He thinks of Eret’s pity, obvious even through his dark glasses and within the white voids of his eyes.

He thinks of Tommy’s fiery rage and Tubbo’s unwilling compliance.

He remembers Wilbur’s hurt and disappointed whispers as he took down L’manberg’s walls.

He remembers Niki’s screams as he burnt down the flag of his own nation.

He remembers the heat of the flames as Eret burnt down the election podium.

He’s scared.

He wants to go home. 

Does he even have a home anymore?

He stares back at the pages on his lap.

_ There is no true answer to that question, and it can only be told, by time. _

He closes the book.

**Author's Note:**

> as much as i need pet war fundy fics,,,,,,ELECTION ARC POG
> 
> fundy's grammatical errors- i'm in pain-
> 
> i had angst ideas during my exam which i completely forgot so uhhhh that's fun


End file.
